Monday, August 16, 2010

What do you do if your ex is causing your kids emotional harm?

We have a half and half split custody arrangement, one week with us, one week with her. She has two extra step kids, plus she's pregnant, and when our three girls come home, they're completely starved for attention. Obviously so! Their mom isn't a bad person necessarily, she just doesn't have time to actually spend with the kids. And once the baby is born? It's only going to get worse.

They cling and whine and misbehave. The middle child is now resorting to violence, and the oldest withdraws and won't talk to us about what's bothering her.

I'm writing this as a step-mom, obviously. The mother absolutely hates me, hates that I have a good relationship with the kids, and drags me through the dirt whenever possible. She won't talk to us about what goes on at her house so we're basically in the dark, unless it's something the kids bring up. She blatantly refuses to listen to how we deal with problems, and the poor kids have no consistency in their lives.

How do we deal with this? I firmly believe that kids should have both parents in their lives, but these kids don't know which way is up. It takes us the whole week to get them back on an even emotional keel, and then the cycle starts over again.

But would the courts listen to us about this? There's no obvious physical abuse. And she's their mother. Is there anyway they would give us full custody?

What kind of proof do we need? What can we do to give these kids the emotional balance and support they need when their mom refuses to take us into consideration?What do you do if your ex is causing your kids emotional harm?
Maybe the mother is high strung with everything going on in her life, but it still does not excuse her behaviour..

Their mother is probably jealous of your relationship with father but again there is no reason for her to take it out on you.. You're trying to do what is best for the children... And good on you for being there.

I think the only way you'll get anyone to listen about whats going on is if there is physical or sexual harm.. The father is probably the only one that can really say the reason's why he wants the chldren in his care... Unfornately for you hun you can only sit back and hope for the kids sake that everything falls into place...

Have the children and father seek counselling so that they can assess their situation and that it is put on record that the children are behaving like this... Seek a lawyer for advice also...

i hope I've helped a lil.....

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